Now that I am in my late 20’s, ang daming realizations and experiences ang naaalala ko. It made me look back to where I was before at kung sino na ba talaga ako ngayon. I have learned a lot from relationships, friendships, life choices and tough situations na feeling ko hindi ko na malalampasan noon. I wanted to share this with you and I hope that it would also make you realize something.
So sa mga kapwa ko 27 years old na or nasa late 20’s or early 30’s, this blog is for you.
My 10 realizations now that I’m 27:
1.“Di baleng konti, basta totoo.”
In friendships and in any kind of relationship, honesty and sincerity are very important. As I grow older, napapansin ko na mas kumukonti yung circle of friends ko, unlike when I was younger and vulnerable. Now, I begin to appreciate quality relationships rather than the quantity. Hindi na baleng konti basta alam kong totoo sila sakin and I am also the same with them. We cannot force people to stay in our lives. People come and go. There are some relationships that won’t choose to stay with you, and it’s perfectly fine. Having a friend who’s got your back is a great blessing. Kaya sobrang thankful ako sa mga taong nananatiling totoo sakin through highs and lows of my life.
2. “Mas masakit, mas nagpapagaling.”
Before, I get easily offended when someone corrects me or points out my mistakes. Masakit kasi sa feeling yung nakikita yung mali mo, pero narealize ko pagtagal yung effect ng mga harsh words and corrections na natanggap ko noon. I have learned a lot and it made me a better person. It made me change my childish ways and improve my weaknesses. I am so blessed to have spiritual leaders, parents, matured friends, and a partner na hindi natatakot sabihin sakin kapag may mali talaga or panget sakin. They will always tell me the truth, even if it hurts. And I think that is the best thing that any other person could offer because I can really feel their love and concern.
3. “Actions speak louder than words.”
Mabilis akong ma-flatter sa sweet and flowery words when someone compliments me or promises me something. Ang dali kong makipagpalagayan ng loob sa tao kapag magaling sila sa words. Pero narealize ko na it doesn’t really matter that much kung wala naman sa gawa. It is much better to trust and rely on actions rather than a person’s word, kasi wala namang guarantee that they could really do it. Mas naaappreciate ko na ngayon yung nagpapakita sakin ng pagmamahal through their actions. Yung alam mong kahit hindi nila lagi sabihin, they will show it to you genuinely and you will feel it.
4. “Once trust is broken, it will be very hard to gain”
I realized na napakahalaga pala talaga ng trust in any kind of relationship. Sa sobrang dami ng magagandang nagawa mo sa isang tao, it could all easily fade away when one mistake is done. It is easy to forget but trusting someone is a different issue. You could choose to cut away someone in your life or make them stay, but with a lot of risks involved. Yung kahit pilitin mong magtiwala sa taong yun ulet, mahirap nang magawa. It will take a lot of time and effort to make the relationship work again. Pero most of the time, relationships are broken for good once trust is gone.
5. “You will mature and grow with the right person.”
Being in a relationship with the right person really matters. I remember when I used to fall in love with the wrong people back when I was very impulsive and young. Puro puso ang pinapagana, hindi iniisip ang future at masyadong immature. I got hurt because of my selfish ways and ignoring the red flags with the wrong person. Mas iniisip ko na sundin lang lagi ang nararamdaman ko, kahit na alam kong may mali na. But everything changed when I met my current partner. Our personalities complement each other. We have the same goals, dreams and thinking. Mas naranasan ko yung saya na magmahal kasi mas may nagmamahal rin pala sakin. We grow and we learn from each other. Nakita ko rin na mas nagmature ako as a person because of him. Then I realized that it’s true. You’ll really know and feel if a person is right for you.
6. “Sometimes you have to learn the hard way.”
I have learned in life that pain could be a blessing in the long run. Sobrang dami ko na din pinagdaanan in different aspects of my life, but the important thing is I’ve learned my lesson from those past mistakes. Minsan talaga para matauhan, kailangan mo munang masaktan. It doesn’t happen to everyone, pero it was applicable to me. We cannot avoid what life brings us. Hindi rin natin mapipili ang mga mapagdadaanan natin. Pero I am grateful for those experiences because it made me the person that I am today. Life could offer tough situations na hindi mo inaasahan, kaya mabuti nang turn them into life lessons na madadala mo throughout life. Hindi madali pero with the help of my family and friends, nalagpasan ko lahat. And I can truly say that it’s all worth it.
7. “You can do things that you’ve never done before”
Minsan naka-focus na lang ako sa mga kaya kong gawin at sa mga nakasanayan ko na. But through the years, nalaman ko that I could do so much more. Yung mga di ko inaakalang magawawa ko ay kaya ko rin pala. I started to learn how to bake then turned it into a small business. I learned how to ride a bike even sa edad ko ngayon. Hindi ko talaga aakalaing matututo pa ako. I also started writing many blogs and articles and had a collaboration with Boiling waters through my own online show. Those were some of the things na nagawa kong bago. There’s nothing wrong in trying. You’ll never know na madidiscover mo palang pala yung mga bagay na gusto mo talagang gawin.
8. “Not everyone will like you, no matter how hard you try.”
Before, masyado akong affected sa sasabihin ng iba and sa opinions nila about me. This made me insecure and conscious, kaya hindi ko rin nagagawang magpakatotoo sa sarili ko. I wanted to please everybody that time and I found myself disappointed. It’s really true that not everyone will like you and appreciate you, no matter how hard you try. Kahit ginawa mo na lahat ng maganda, may mga tao pa rin talaga na matatawag na “hater” for some reason. Kaya kung sa tao lang titingin, talagang nakakadismaya. I have learned the art of dedma when it comes sa mga ganung tao. As long as I have inner peace and I feel happy and confident with myself, hindi ko kailangang magpaapekto sa sasabihin ng iba. For me, that’s real happiness that no one could ever take away from me.
9. “People who love you will always be happy for you.”
Dito ko talaga nalaman na yung mga totoong nagmamahal sa’yo yung mga totoong masaya rin para sa’yo. They are happy with your achievements and good news. Hindi ka nila tinitignan as competition or kinaiinggitan. They see you as an inspiration as they genuinely express their happiness for you. I appreciate those kinds of people. Hindi rin nila tinotolerate kapag may mali sakin. They are the perfect balance. Hindi sila mapaghanap ng butas sa’yo. For me, those kinds of people are rare lang na makikilala natin sa buhay. For the past years, this has been my observation sa mga taong totoong mahal ako. My happiness is their happiness.
10. “You’ll enjoy the beauty of love when you have experienced its pain.”
This is true for me because I know the feeling of being betrayed and neglected sa isang relationship. I ended up giving all my love before sa mga taong hindi naman worth it. Nakita ko na lang yung sarili ko na in pain and depressed and those were the worst experiences na naranasan ko sa buhay. But I really believe that every pain has a purpose. I could not imagine that love could be beautiful and true someday. That is why I am thankful that I went through all of the pain so I’ll know the feeling of true love. It is not something that we could always experience kaya you’ll really know na totoo na kapag dumating na. Because love is not always about hurting, it is something that will make you a better person and will make you enjoy life more.
Thanks for reading my blog! I hope that it also made you realize something. Life may be complicated, but it will all be worth it in the end.