An open letter to the guy I loved the most

To the guy I loved the most,

We met at the time that is not too perfect for us, it’s imperfctly imperfect timing I guess. Right man, wrong timing, wrong feelings. You are a broken man and so was I, a broken lady that keeps on smiling through the pain. You’re a one sad and broken soul, and me, a healing spirit, chose to heal you despite of being broken too. ‘Twas the best, and worst decision I made. Best because I learned, and saw how much I’m capable of loving someone. Worst, because I fell inlove with a man that is comitted to a loyal woman. I know it was wrong, but it felt so damn right. I really feel bad for myself because I hurt the feelings of your woman, a very good and kind one. But I was hurt by you too. I know I’m the one who is wrong here, in our set up. I agreed to be your side chic, no not that.

We call it, I call it your “rebound girl” I know it was wrong and how stupid of me letting you take me for granted. But love is being stupid. Then again, I realized my worth. Pitied myself and your long term girl. Don’t ya worry, I was happy for our short span of infinity. In a couple of months I learned that love isn’t about how long you’ve known each other, it’s the feelings I felt. I learned to love you. And love isn’t about give and take, it’s about how much you give your love to someone and not expecting anything in return. I loved you unconditionally. But I was awaken, that in this time, in this life, we are not meant for each other. Maybe in our next life you and me will be together, not now.

I always tell you that I’m always yours, and I love you big time. That won’t change baby, it doesn’t mean that I don’t love you even if we’re not together. I promised you all the love I can and up to this day I’m giving it to you without expecting in return. I’m always yours, always will and always will be. You’re not the first guy I loved but I loved you the most. You are my karma indeed. You are my turning point. You made me realized my worth.

And now, I’m learning to love myself. I hope that you’ll keep on doing good and stop collecting those “jar of hearts” please do love the woman who’ve been with you through thick and thin for the past 6 years. I hope you guys to be happy, I wish you all the best and happines in the world. I love you still but I will not come running back to you. I learned to love myself more and not depending on any man. Being alone is not a sign of being weak at all. It’s a sign of being strong and mature.

I’ll just wait for the real man who’ll come and break the walls that I built, to conquer me, to save me, to love me whole heartedly because that is what I deserve. That is what everyone deserves. Thank you so much for the lessons, you’ll always have a special place at my heart. I love you, but it’s time to accept the fact that we’re not meant to be. This is my good bye, I think. ’till we meet again. I love you mister.

With so much love,

your baby girl

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