Loud music from the speakers as we were surrounded by bottles of liquor, beer, and some chips, enjoying the night and exchanging shots. We had been talking about random things just a while ago, but it must have been the intoxication from the alcohol that led one of my friends to ask me that question. I was stunned. The silence took over, and it was louder than the speakers.
“Have you ever been so sure of someone?” Have you? Have I?
That question hits hard as someone who’s always labeled as non-committal in relationships. So such things never really crossed my mind, or maybe I was just in denial that for the first time, I was so sure of risking it all for someone.
Well, it was a mix of calmness and excitement, perhaps “euphoria”? But one thing for sure, even jargon is not enough to describe the feeling of adrenaline surging through your veins making you want to take the damn chance.
“Lagi kang tumatakbo sa isip ko” is such a cliché, because you’re like a love song that keeps playing in my head. You feel like the vibrancy of a sunset, the calm sea waves amidst the chaos, a shining distant star, and admiring sparkling fireworks above the darkest night.
But, you wanna know the funny thing? I just laughed it off, changed the topic, and didn’t answer my friend’s question.
Unutterable; Tila ba hindi mabigkas ang sigaw ng damdamin.
—yan