Do you feel that sometimes you are alone? That no one can help or guide you? I have. I have felt the loneliness. I have seen that no one can help me in my situation, they could only give me encouraging words. Words that I became to hate because it didn’t help me (Yes, I know that they want to help me but giving encouragement without knowing ones’ situation would mean insensitivity).
I have learned to face life with having a fake smile and to push away the negative feelings I had. To harbor bitterness in my heart that would eat me up alive. I could only trust myself and no one else.
That was until I met God. He showed me that the world is ruthless and ugly but also gentle and beautiful. God showed the wonders of his love, how we have these private conversations and he would tell me that, “My child, you are precious to me. You may experience pain and suffering right now but remember that I have allowed that so that you may grow. I am letting all the trials in so that your heart be strengthened. I am God, I love you. I am here for you. I will turn that grief into rejoice! The promises that I have planted in your heart? I will fulfill them all. My sweet little girl, trust me when I say that I am walking with you.”
God reassured me that in times that my heart is breaking into a thousand pieces, he is with me slowly comforting me. I would feel his warmth rushing through my heart, enveloping me in with Love. For those times that I thought I was ready to give up, God told me to never let go. The days when the enemy attack my weaknesses that I would give in, God would forgive me and would pick me back up. He would guide me through life. He would teach and mold me into someone I aspire to be, a woman after God’s own heart.
Why would God do that you ask? Because God loves me. God loves YOU. He is our TRUE LOVE. He gave up his only Son, Jesus Christ, for us to be free. He gives us the AGAPE love even though we don’t deserve it.
I wish I could tell you that I am fully healed while writing this, but I am not, I am still breaking and crying my heart out. But I know one day, I will be healed. I will be happy. I will be mature enough to discern that God is enough for me and nothing (and no one) will compare to God’s everlasting love towards me. For those who feel that you are alone, turn to God. No one is destined to suffer forever. My prayer is that in times of breaking, you will feel God’s presence wrapping its wings around you. Start a conversation with Him, it makes wonders.
