Why am I too insecure? What happened that I felt this way? How will I be able to overcome this? I have a lot of issues in life, will somebody still love me?
These were just some of the questions I often asked myself before. Maybe because there were numerous factors that led me to feel this way.
I was hurt in the past. I was broken, shattered into pieces. Those situations broke me, my heart, and my whole being. It was so painful that it all manifested even physically. I was so hurt that there were nights I just fell asleep because of too much crying. I questioned my worth. I questioned the love that was given to me. I questioned the attention that was invested in me. I questioned if I am not lovable.
For two long years, I was crying at night, asking myself what happened.
But all throughout those two years, I wasn’t alone. I wasn’t battling alone. There was Someone who’s with me all throughout that journey. He was the One who comforted me. He was the One who reminded me of my worth. He was the One who showered me with His love and grace.
Through Him and only through Him I was able to stand up until this day. He was the reason behind the healing that happened to my life. He was the reason why I can now smile without remembering the pain of my past. He was the reason why I can love because He loved me first.
I can say that the journey isn’t easy. It was so hard. But He was with me, that’s why I was able to overcome them all.
I am still a work in progress. There were still times that insecurities will hit me, and when those times come, I will just go back to the One who has called me His own. I will just remind myself of the things He has done for me and is continually doing. He was, is, and will always be my best friend to whom I will run to at times of trouble.
So for those who are hurting, I pray that God would meet you where you are right now just as how He met me before.
For those who are mourning, I pray that God would comfort you just as how He comforted me before.
For those who are healing, I pray that God would mend your heart just as how He mended mine.
For those who are waiting, I pray that God would satisfy your heart and soul just as how He satisfied me and is continually satisfying me.
I pray that we would all be able to see the beauty of all the bad experiences we had and will utter, “Thank You, Lord, You saved me.”