In every game, there is a triumphant winner and a sulky loser. In this game of ours, no matter how desperate I want to succeed, I find myself dealing you the cards that will eventually lead to my fall.
This is so wrong.
I was doing okay before I knew you – minding my own business, doing my own thing, finally – albeit slowly – moving on. Then unexpectedly, you found the best way to play with me. I was amazed to see my walls crumbling down in front of me giving you access to the deepest corners of my heart and soul. You have caught me by surprise with all of my tokens and pieces down.
Damn. This is absolutely wrong.
I promised myself that I would not let you get the best of me, that my vulnerability will not join us in our game. Yet the warmth of your smile is enough to keep the coldness of my heart at a halt. Pushing people away has constantly been my defense mechanism; but no matter how much I try to push you away, I always find reasons to pull you back as if you are willing to stay.
This is a mistake in the making – we cannot continue like this. Not unless I want to entertain another heartbreak where this is eventually going to end up. Yes, I am sure of it. I am nothing more than one of your conquests and you will become nothing less than one of my regrets.
I can only wish that I were strong enough to fight my own feelings. I wish that my heart would just listen to my head for once and stop the persistent beating every time I feel your skin near mine.
I can only beg you to undo your moves and let me have a fighting chance to trace back my turns and recount the strategies I once had.
Why do I even feel this way? This was not how the game is expected to play out.
Now I am utterly, miserably, and undeniably in love with you.
And so, alas, you win.