I created the “uncertain feelings” before because I don’t want to hide it to myself anymore, and writing what I truly felt was my last resort to lessen my burden because I’m already tired of analyzing every words and every actions you’re doing to me.
I was too focused on decoding your mixed signals, maybe because I hoped that you had something when in fact it was really nothing.
And the sad thing is, I was blinded by my own feelings that I thought what you feel was real when it was just another assumption I guess.
I got restless because my mind kept on reading between the lines. I know I could have just asked to know the answer but maybe even I got afraid to know the truth and some of you might think that I was so coward, but sorry if I can’t because I’m not prepared for the possibility, and the answer might cause even greater damage to me.
I remember the time when you asked me if I’ve been hurt before? And when I asked you the same question, you told me that there’s someone whom you thought you’ve gotten close with and you already got your hopes up, but your closeness disappeared so you got hurt, but that someone is trying to come back again.
I’m so sorry if I assumed that I was the one you’re trying to refer to your story and if happens that it was really me you could have showed me that you’re really persistent and interested, things could have been different if that happened.
But sometimes no matter how we try, some things doesn’t always favor us or give clarity to our questions, so I’m finally letting go of my uncertain feelings towards you, and I hope that in the future if happen that all of your feelings were true, I hope you find the courage to say it but for now, I’ll focus on myself first because I’m also looking for some clarifications and validations from other people that I forgot that I was working progress.