One thing that I learned over the past year was to say what , and how you really feel towards someone dear to you and to never missed it until its too late.
3 months after my fiance and I called off the wedding, I went to Starbucks to think and to refresh my mind and soul.
I was battling with my mind and my heart. Devastated and brain dead.
There I saw you calling my name, you were just a barista trainee. holding my drink.
You smiled, I smiled. And my heart throbbed. I’ve got butterflies in my stomach. I was totally fascinated and mesmerized.
I finally said –
Lord, I know I’ve lost one but you have given me another reason to live. – and that’s the day I met you.. God, help me know her more. I prayed and talked to God about you. I promised myself that if you arent committed, Id do what it takes and everything to win you. Love at first sight is indeed true.
Every time I see you, I’ve been hiding my smile and happiness. Guess am good with that. “Not too obvious as they say.”
I had spent my time looking for your last name. Searched all over social media. I even had my secretary searched for your full name. And then one day, she handed me your fb acct. – this is where it all started.
I searched for your name. I saw that you’re in a relationship. It really saddened me. And it got me broken. I tried giving it a shot by sending u flowers. I thought about it hundred times even though I knew you were committed. I sent it to let you know that someone appreciates you. And that in the world full of pretentions and lies, there’s someone true to you.
Ever since I got the chance to talk to you, never a day I’d not think about you. I’ve been in front of my computer every minute to check if u have responded. I’ve been holding my phone 24/7 telling you how my day goes by, asking yours. Id wake up late at night dead tired and sleepy to check your responses. Trying to start a conversation. Asking non sense questions, asking about anything . But the saddest and hurtful part is, I have never gotten any response. Life is indeed so cruel to have liked and admired someone who have fully brushed you off. I was totally hurt. Felt avoided and ignored. God knows that my intentions are pure and how much I was hurt.
Worry not, I certainly understand the need to not respond. You are committed and I respect your decision that you are not allowed to entertain anybody.
Today and moving forward, I will keep everything in me, fighting the battle Ive started every single day. So long, Angel.
Perhaps one day, we’d meet again. Till then, I can finally talk to you, hold you and know more about you freely. and youd feel the same way I am feeling. I hope that you’d see it in my eyes the next time we see each other. I know you know who I am. Listen to your heart. You’d be sure who I am. Take care and always be happy. God bless you.
As what lesson I’ve learned, — always tell someone how u really feel as we only live once . Seize it.
God knows how true I am..
Too near and yet, hearts are too far away. 🙁
Farewell.