A friendship dies for a reason. It may be painful for us, especially if you really had a good bond, but it’s always for the good of both sides. All we have to do is accept that people come and go and learn to be happy where they are. Do not blame yourself or your friend for how it ended. It ended because it was no longer healthy. And if you continue to be friends, you’ll just hurt each other. Perhaps it’s time for the two of you to grow apart and find someone who can assist you as well as develop habits that suit each of you. For sure, you know the red flags in your friendship. You’re merely blind because you care and want to keep them. Now it’s time to move on.
But, regardless of why the friendship ended, wish the person well and be trustworthy enough to keep whatever was shared. You can grieve without spilling any tea about him or her. You can let your support system know how much the separation has hurt you without recruiting them to hate your former friend. There’s a saying that “pain changes people.” Do not let the change mold you into a heartless person. Take time to heal and understand. Don’t linger on the unpleasant things that have happened to avoid feeling hate. Try to recall the happy times, or perhaps forget the things you used to do together—although forgetting the memories you had with them is hard.
Allow yourself enough time to process everything without hating them. Appreciate those that stay, and don’t shut the door on others who want to arrive.
Photo by Amine rock hoovr on Unsplash
