Do you know what hurts me right now?
It’s the fact that even if I love you, if you don’t love me, I will only get hurt.
Do you know what’s crazy?
It’s the fact that you’re not my ideal man.
You don’t have the qualities that could turn my world upside down.
You don’t give me butterflies in my stomach.
I keep hating you.
I keep running away from you.
But you know what’s the craziest part?
It’s even when you’re far from my dream guy,
I keep wanting to talk to you even though we barely have anything to talk to.
I sometimes have the urge to see you.
I keep on checking on you.
I’m jealous of the thought of you talking to other girls.
You frustrate me the most.
But I’m afraid to admit that maybe I really have fallen.
I’m still open to the idea of letting you go.
‘Cause one of the things I learned in life is you can’t keep someone by your side if God doesn’t allow you to do so.
Forcing it will only result to pain.
That’s why while I still can, I will avoid you.
I will run away, as fast as I could or slowly but surely so it will not be obvious.
I will let you go until the day comes that maybe, just maybe, God will allow me to hold onto you.
Maybe a day will come when God will finally allow me to keep you.
But for now, He keeps telling me to let you go.
So I will.
Though I know that my heart might resist to do so.
But as the Bible said, the “heart is deceitful”
I really can’t rely on what my heart says.
I need to listen to God for me to live.
I really, really need to listen and obey God.
Even when it hurts.
Even when it’s hard.
Because I trust in the Lord and I believe He has something in store for me that is way, way better than I could ever imagine.
I will always pray that you and your family is doing fine and that you will never give up on your faith.
I am hoping that one day, I will get to see the man who God wants you to become.
Keep on praying, and keep your faith.
I believe in you.
From Me to you.
~Fati C.
P.S. Is it possible to post this on your page? The guy I am writing to follows your page and I know he will get to read this just in case.
These are the words that I can’t tell him. I am hoping that by doing this, this letter will not remain unsent.
Thank you and God bless you all. 🙂