“I lost it. I messed up. I’m unworthy. I will never be enough.
These were the words that I kept on repeating in my head. These were the words that I kept on stabbing my heart with.
I felt so alone, drowned, hopeless and helpless. I’m was blaming myself over losing a “treasure” I cannot take to lose. I’m was mourning over a death I have not foreseen. A death of something I held on very carefully for a very long time. But now, can’t even take a grasp of it.
I cried silent cries. Shouted voiceless shouts. No amount of voice could ever express the pain I had. Betrayed. Broken.”
How long would you stay that way? How long would you grieve over a lost love that’s not really meant to stay? How long would you long and hold on for someone who already let go of you?
It was painful? Yes. It will really be. No one has the authority to tell you that you shouldn’t be hurt or you should not feel that excruciating pain in your chest. There’s emptiness in your heart and lots of confussions in your thoughts. But after all of your cries, your shouts, your mournings; after you have shut down your doors, Honey, open your eyes, dry out your tears open your windows and let the sun shine through your face. Open your doors for those who really care about you. Open your heart for the NEW YOU! Feel the freedom and peace within you that only the Father in heaven can provide.
Have you not realized that you just have been saved? Yes, you are. The Man above just saved you from a relationship He didn’t make for you. He saved you from being with the wrong guy. At first, you thought you were scammed after investing everything you have, or tricked by the magic of love you thought was real. But, in reality, God just let you laid down over the real luxuries of losing him.
The luxury of discovering your real self. Developing it and letting yourself fall in love even more with the real you. To appreciate more how and what the gift of solitude really feels like. It is your most perfect time to allow yourself indulge in the favors of God for you.
The luxury of being alone and be inlove with God even more. Allowing yourself to grow and develop that intimate relationship with Christ. The luxury of making yourself be engaged to new challenges knowing you are able to get through whatever it may be because God had made you stronger, braver and better. The luxury of being married to your dreams for you are now courageous enough to do the things you thought you couldn’t do without him. The luxury of wandering along the wonders of the world. You are brave enough to pursue the goals that frightens you the most. The luxury of loving yourself as how you really wanted to be loved. The luxury of making yourself as the right woman while waiting for the right man.
You are God’s princess and He didn’t make you so precious just only to settle with a man that’s unworthy of you. With a man who can’t see you as a prize as how Jacob saw Rachel. Be a treasure, a diamond, hidden in the tight embrace of Christ for with Him you are assured and secured that you are worthy and enough, and will never be betrayed, cheated and broken, never again.
Embrace your gift of solitude and take this moment as your preparation time. Take a leap of faith and take delight in the Lord. Take His promise that this preparation time is never and will never be a wasted time. God has blessed you with this gift while others are just only dreaming of it. Don’t let it slip away. For this moment, you are not really waiting upon the Lord, but He is waiting on you to be perfectly ready to receive the another gift He has for you. Behold, when God’s perfect time arrives, the man that He made exactly and especially just for you will be delivered right in front of your doorsteps, unexpectedly. Never late, nor too early, but just right in time. “For when God knows you’re ready, get ready!” 😊🥂
