18 August 2018
Hey there,
How are you? Hope that you are doing fine and somehow warm in the place you are in. I really want to talk to you badly this past few days to tell you something. Something that I don’t understand. Something in the way I see and feel when I am with you and when I think of you. You see I can’t seem to know what is this happening in me that whenever I see you, talk to you and whenever you are around, I feel dumbfoundedly happy just by seeing you smile, recognizing your scent, experiencing your wit and even your stupidity. I really don’t know why. I feel like a different person just by thinking about it.
We met because of a common friend a month ago, we talked, we spent time together and we laugh and that made something in me somehow more alive. Before I met you, I am contended with the life that I have. I am happy for not being with anyone nor I don’t long for someone or to be wanted by someone. I thought that that would never change, but somehow, by the smallest spec, something has changed.
I know that I don’t even know you that much but I am very much interested to know more. My curious and rebellious mind is craving for more about you. I am puzzled if you feel the same way and I am dying to know. The way you talk to me and how we look at each other tells me (of course I assume!) that there is no resentment from you to me in knowing you better. Even other people see that and tell us about it which shocked me to know if are we really that obvious.
Everything is going well until this week. I got confused, somehow disappointed and sad to see someone is clearly flirting with you and I never saw any kind of restraint from you to that person. I kept my silence and even planted a ton of “benefit of the doubt” that you guys are just friends. Believe me I forced my self everyday to believe that. I never asked you about anything, to clear things up cause I never wanted you to feel that you need to explain all of the things that you are doing to me or to anyone. But I am a bit irritated with the way I see things unveiling in front of me. I am not a fan of anyone too aggressive just to get something or someone that they would think would be a better fit to them and I always thought you are not too.
Well, I am writing you this for you to somehow understand what I feel as of the moment. What I think right now. I am not rushing to get answers nor requiring you to give them to me asap. I just want you to know what’s inside my head this past few days.
I am still here interested, dying in vain for my questions to be answered in the right time and still excited to see you everyday.
Your friend,
TJ
