Months have already passed yet it still feels like it was yesterday. I am still here where we left things off, still holding the pieces that I wish we could still fix, but I let my pride and ego take me and agreed on what we talked about.— A breakup. At first, I thought it was the right thing to do since I felt we were so distant from each other, but as days passed I realized that I was the cold one, I was selfish, I was the one to blame why I am still here. But I thought if I let you go you can still have an opportunity to have a better life without me, you can focus on the things you want to accomplish in your life without me as your baggage. But I was wrong. Agreeing to the breakup was the biggest regret of my life and it is still difficult for me to move forward. It’s still painful for me to let you go completely. The thought of you is still here on my mind and I always ask myself if I deserve you. You were easy to be loved but I was too needy of your affection. I was wrong to take the call, I was wrong on letting you walk away, I was wrong on leaving you. I am not saying this to win you back or anything else. I know you’re happy now and I don’t want to ruin it cause you deserve it. You deserve to be loved by someone who can complement your needs. You deserve someone who will stay with you until the very end. If I can turn back time, I hope I was that person and make things right with you. But it’s too late. You’re with someone already and I will respect that. I still regret the decision I chose but if letting you go will make you the best version of yourself and the better person for your soul then that will make me happy, soon I will find my path where I will no longer look back and linger to our past, instead, I will hold on to the memories until I finally can set it free. I am sorry for causing you pain and doubts but sorry will never be enough. I hope someday when we cross our paths again and mature enough to face our past. I hope it will be our time by then.
Boiling Waters
