“Kaibigan mo pero sinaktan mo”

I hope you could feature my story as one of your topics. This is a painful experience of what i’ve been through a few months ago. I have a guy friend who became my boyfriend after 15 years of being just friends. Although, i won’t deny the fact that whenever we get the chance to meet there’s a spark between us. To make the story short we never really dated because we tried not ruin our friendship. Not until last year, he courted me and said that he is no longer the guy i thought he was. He is the typical guy who knows all the right things and words to say just to get a girl. I’m not gonna romanticized him because i knew from the very start that he’s a player. But i still gave him the chance to be my boyfriend because i believe all the things he said. I mean, come on.. who would even think that he still wanna play at 30. I mean that’s the age when everybody are getting married. When we started dating, he told me that he has plans of marrying me. He even wanted me to move in to his place. And as for me, i tried to hide my happiness whenever he brought up those notion to me because i don’t want him to feel that i’m so into him or i don’t want to boost his ego. So, one day, he asked if he could borrow some money because he needs to pay his bills since his ATM was broken. He said that he would contact the bank and have his ATM replaced so he could pay me back. Every month he would asked me if he could borrow money again and as a gf i would lend him some money believing that he would pay, since his my friend/boyfriend. However, i started to doubt him because every month he would make an excuse that his cellphone was broken and needs to be repaired at the shop. He would borrow money to me again. The worst thing was i am the only one paying for everything whenever we’re together. So i decided to confront him and told him that i know what he was doing. I just told him those things because i can’t take what he’s doing. I read something on his chatbox that he was having steamy convos with another girl. I also learned that he was doing something really bad. He is also into gambling. I knew about his gambling because before we started dating he told me already about it but he said that he already stop and won’t do it again. But then again, all the things he said wasn’t true. So i decided to break up with him since it’s too much for me to handle. He tried to pursue me to have me back again. While he was doing it, he was already making out with another girl who happens to be someone i knew also. It was so painful because he doesn’t have any remorse at all. How can a person do such things without feeling any guilt. Now he’s making “parinig” that someone accepted him despite of all his sins, someone who saw him as a person and not his sin. I hate him for comparing me to that girl. I don’t regret that i left him. I just told him this line ” Kaibigan mo pa ko pero sinaktan mo lang din ako” .

I really hate him for making me feel bad about myself. I was the one who was there for him when he was on the lowest moment of his life and now i’m the bad person for leaving him because again he said i can’t accept him. How can i accept him when he always do the same mistakes. Sorry seems to be used these days as an excuse para paulit ulit gawin ang mali ginagawa ka ng tanga.