Uncertain Feelings

I somehow felt your feelings before, Its just that I don’t want to assume unless otherwise stated. You were giving me hints about it but your actions do the opposite. You would normally talk to me if there are other people around but when its just the two of us, things get awkward and even I lost for words.

The way you talk to other people makes me conclude that maybe you liked them more than me, but some part of me wants to believe that maybe you’re just afraid to do the first move because you actually mentioned it that you are afraid of me.

So I tried confiding it to some of my friends, and what they said made me even more conclude that maybe you liked me too.

But things get really complicated, because I have this feeling that some of my friends likes you too and I have to admit, seeing you laughing and chatting with them makes me a bit jealous, so in return I sometimes do the same to others. I know it sounds too immature but I also want to know if you feel the same as I do.

I even tried distancing myself from you, because I don’t want to lose the friendship I have with them (If my conclusions are true) and to guard my heart from the possible heartache and maybe if I do that, I’ll know your true intentions to me and perhaps get an answer to my uncertain feelings towards you.

I always have this battle in my head, to try to get close to you or let you do the first move, because I don’t want to appear needy or clingy in front of everybody and I know how vulnerable I am so I try to build my walls but waiting for someone like you to destroy and make your way to me.

But maybe distancing from you is the best way for now, and I hope that I’ll find the answer to this uncertainty so that I can already move forward and let you go. And if happen that you feel the same way, please make it clear, say it and prove it to me so that I can also validate my feelings towards you.

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