An Open Letter to My God’s Best

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Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the official position of Boiling Waters PH.

Dear God’s Best,

I don’t know how I’ve come across the idea of writing this letter. But let’s see how this goes, I hope it ends well and that you may come to think of me as a lump of clay being molded into a refined piece of pottery that can actually be put to use.

I’d like to start off by apologizing. I am sorry — for being myself — I’ve done a myriad of failures that had caused me to diminish my self-worth.

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Forgive me for not being patient enough to wait for you to come sweep me off my feet. I haven’t been careful enough in choosing the people to come into my life.

I am a mess. Sorry.

My heart is ragged, full of bullet holes plastered with band-aids to make it look okay. I don’t know how much of it is left because I’ve already given too much away to everyone who came in and left my life.

I am sorry.

There is a colossal disaster inside my head. I am haunted by the past that has left me broken and wounded. I try my best to run away from it. I muster all the strength inside me to lift up to God all the monsters in my head that give me nightmares. I try hard, every single day.

I battle depression and anxiety. I put up a face in front of everyone else everyday to prevent myself from being vulnerable. I pretend to be a strong person, but I am not. I am falling apart.

I am held together by the hopes that He is doing something great in my life. That I am under reconstruction.

After all, I know and I am certain that He works all things together for the good of those who love Him. (Romans 8:28)

That’s the only thing I’m sure of right now: that I love the Lord too much to let go of the hopes and promises He has given me.

I am not perfect. I am nowhere near that word. But I am real.

I’d like to believe that we are both works in progress. That’s why I can keep my hopes up, because He’ll never disappoint.

I hope that while we are still away from each other, we’ll continue to nurture our relationship with our Creator; may we become fruitful in our calling and that we may glorify His Name in all aspects of our separate lives.

I pray that your patience will never falter. That you will continue to have faith in all that He has in store for you. I hope that it’ll never cross your mind that you are waiting in vain. But may He constantly remind us that our season of waiting is where we grow most fruitful. Hold on, dear.

If there is one thing I’ve learned from all the failures of untimely relationships, it’s the undeniable fact that waiting doesn’t hurt as much as getting your heart broken, because it actually spares you from all the unnecessary pain. How I wish I’d known that sooner than later.

Someday soon, I know the Lord will restore me completely. Same with you (if you are going through the rocks too). All will be alright, let’s just trust the process for He is always in control.

When the time comes that the Lord will cause our paths to cross, I can only promise to support you; that I’ll always be there to cheer you on. I will do my best to listen to all that you have to say — because I know it matters to be heard.

I am certain that our story lies in the hands of the One who created the universe. And as glorious as the stars above, so will our love story be, because He has created everything to be wonderful in its time.

I believe that you will be the person who sees my worth in the eyes of the Lord. The person God will send to remind me that I am worthy to be pursued, treasured, and loved; despite my shortcomings and failures in the past. I believe that you are a miracle that God will cause in my life in His perfect time.

I trust that the Lord will be our portion. He will complete us. You and I will just exist to complement each other.

I know not your name; and I haven’t the faintest idea of how you’re like — except that you are a man whose heart is being molded after His.

I am so excited to meet you and serve the Lord with you. Know that you are always in my prayers. I pray that by His grace, I will become the right person He has intended me to be.

I will wait for you.

I love you with the love of the Lord

Sincerely,

Me.

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