I have a confession to make.
I witnessed your wedding without you knowing. Why? I want to gauge how I actually feel.
Thank God that I did because I realized a few things.
One, I can’t imagine myself getting married – I know it is unfair, knowing that you have done so much for me and for us in the years that we were together.
Two, you were made for someone else. I saw how your eyes sparkled when you looked at her as you recited your wedding vows. I have never seen you look at me like that.
Lastly, I still have so many things that I want to do for myself that I haven’t done so because I am the family’s breadwinner.
I remember the times you’d come last on my list of priorities because I had to take care of my siblings. You were there for me throughout my ups and downs and I wasn’t really sure if I was there for you. My plate was already overflowing with a whole bunch of things I didn’t know which one to start. My plans were always family-centered and you admired me for that. You were always the best listener, my go-to person when I am overwhelmed. You were always there for me whilst I only care about my own problems. I was a selfish lover but you never questioned me about that. You were always so considerate.
I have recently been contemplating what I want to do in life. I have things I want to achieve and most of them are about self-development. I guess that’s because I didn’t get the chance to give myself credit for all the hard work that I did because of the responsibilities I had to bear.
I’m pursuing a hobby, I’m aiming for financial stability, and I am planning on achieving a degree. This is all because you did not choose me. Imagine if you didn’t let go of my hands? I might not be able to do these anymore because my life would drastically change.
Thank you. For letting go, for setting me free, and for pursuing someone else. The pain I had to go through was all worth it. I am happier without you and you are too…without me.
