Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the official position of Boiling Waters PH.
I have read this online conversation about trusting someone.
A: What if I break your trust someday?
B: Trusting you is my decision, proving me wrong is your choice.
Every day, you pick up the pieces of yourself that were shattered by people you trusted. It hurts to see those pieces, and there are days you get tired of picking them up. You started hating yourself for believing that their intentions are pure and that they care about you. You thought that they were honest and would protect you no matter what. Their sweet gestures deceived you, and it’s sad to know that you fell into their trap. You began to wonder what you did wrong and why they chose to hurt you in this way.
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We’d never know who to trust. People may appear to be your friends, but the truth is they never really are in the first place. It’s scary to meet these people in our lives.
1. Pretends to listen to you, but the truth is they’re just getting some information from you before backstabbing you.
2. A friend of yours for a long time, but after a misunderstanding, spitting out false information about you.
3. Acts trustworthy while judging you behind your back.
4. Would deceive you into thinking that they care, but make a feast of your problems afterward.
5. After you cut ties with them, they would recruit people to hate you.
And for sure, you also have something in mind that you can add to this list.
Betrayal causes trauma. You tend to believe that everyone you meet will do the same thing, so you build high walls to protect yourself from being hurt again. And sometimes you have this paranoid feeling that everyone you see knows something about you. You began to wonder: “Who can I trust now?”
“The saddest thing about betrayal is that it never comes from your enemies, it comes from those you trust the most.” – Unknown Author
If only we had the power to see who the real ones were, I guess we could have avoided letting our guard down around people.
Some people say, “Just let it go.” If only we had the strength to not think about it in a snap, I’d be happy. That is why I hope people will also see that living through this trauma is not easy. Nobody can understand how painful and traumatic that experience was unless they are in your shoes. So please do not invalidate us if we are afraid to speak up sometimes. If we stutter when we share problems. We’re just hesitant to say it because we’re afraid if you’re someone we can trust or not. We are also trying to overcome this fear, so please bear with us. Be there to cheer us up and pray.
If the time comes that you’re tired enough to pick up the pieces of yourself, know that it’s okay; you can pause for a while, but don’t stop. Keep getting the pieces so you’ll be whole again. Learn from your experience and guard your heart. I know it’s hard to forgive right away, and it’s okay. Take your time to heal from it. Some people will come to deceive you just to gain your trust. But I know there are still people who stay and will protect you all the way.
And of course, always pray to God to protect you. Pray for eyes that can discern whether someone is true to you or not. Ask for wisdom in knowing when to speak and when to remain silent. Ask for the strength to get up every day and fight the trauma of that experience. And pray for your heart and mind’s continuous healing. It is a difficult battle to be in. The enemy will throw lies at us, especially in this situation; that’s why we should cling to God even more. He listens!
Always know that the Lord is the only one who can be trusted. In Him alone, you are secured. Please, hang in there.
Photo by Daniel Mingook Kim on Unsplash
