Up until this moment, I am still very close to the guy I fell in love with but is in love with another girl. I am not sure who that girl is, maybe it is the same girl he fell in love with a decade or so ago but she’s gone or maybe someone else. I wouldn’t wanna know. All I want is for both of us to be happy at the right time… For us to find the person who can complete the missing piece in our hearts and fulfill the love story God has written. Hmmm… I am praying and waiting for that perfect time to come.
God took her away from him last year through a sudden death. We went to the wake to support him and like in movies, it was really heartbreaking to see your close friend in that situation when you know he’s happy with her for more than a decade. Whoa! I can’t measure how much sadness I can see in his eyes when I saw him. I can never imagine how it would feel to lose the love of your life. It shattered my heart to know that there’s nothing his friends or family can do but to wait for the right time that the wounds would heal.
He was out of the office for days to try surviving and we’re only supporting him remotely every once in a while because he lives so far from us.
Months after, he managed to get out of his shell. He traveled, went out with his friends, made himself busy but in every picture I see, I know he’s only forcing his smile and he’s still dying inside. When will the wound heal? When is that time?
One day, I can’t remember when exactly but we started talking. Talking about anything under the sun for hours almost everyday. I find him sweet in so many ways. He’s a good man, very kind, and loved by a lot of people. To make the long story short, I fell for him 3 to 4 months after. I was so scared to tell him because we’re close friends and I am afraid that if I would, things would start to be different. However, days passed by and I became more and more confused of what is going on between us. He started noticing that I am avoiding him and he asked. I was so close to not telling him the truth but my mind pushed me to say it. It is time for clarity over confusion. On that revelation day, I learned that he’s not really into me. He explained that he’s just sweet because we’re close friends and to top it all, he said he’s in love with another girl. It hurts big time but a lady can handle so much pain, right? To my surprise, he didn’t change a bit and we continued talking like nothing happened. I managed to build a Great Wall of China not to get swayed by his charm. Haha. How can I move on? When will be the right time? Only God knows…