Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the official position of Boiling Waters PH.
1. It’s ok not to be ok.
You are not ok, and its ok. Ok lang na umiyak ka araw araw, maging malungkot, maging broken, maging empty, maging misrable,uminom, magdrama, magalit, magsisi, mag breakdown, magwala. Ok lang na minsan hindi mo alam ang gagawin mo. Ok lang na paulit ulit ka nlng. Ok lang na nararamdaman mo lahat ng pangit na pakiramdam sa mundo. Ok lang yan kasi natural at normal yan, lahat ng tao dumadaan sa stage na yan. Ulitin ko ha, DUMADAAN. Hindi po tinatambayan ang stage na yan. Bangon bagon din girl, huwag maging lugmok forever. Ikaw din you’ll miss out all the fun and blessing life is offering. ❤️
Huwag mong takasan ang pain. Feel the it, feed the pain until it hurts no more. That’s the only way to conquer it.
While you are busy reading this article, try mo rin makinig sa episode namin:
2. Every pain is different from the other.
This is for the people who gives us advice’s. Pain is something that you don’t compare even you had it worse. If we are not able do anything that you told us to do, please don’t judge us. Iba iba naman tayo ng pag cope sa pain. You have to know that we are trying our best to help ourselves. Sino ba naman ang ayaw umusad? Lahat naman tayo gusto malampasan kung anu man ung pinagdadaanan natin. We are sorry if paulit ulit nlng kami but it’s a part of the process. Please understand and respect us. Ang hirap lag talaga. Be patient with us. Sometimes we just need someone who is simply there, listening without any judgment. Ang mga taong broken kasi yan ang mga taong sobrang titigas ng ulo pero pag natauhan at nautog yan, titibay yan.
3. You are the only one who can help yourself.
Your friends or support group cannot carry your baggage. It’s never a responsibility of anyone not even your best friend. Sa totoo lang kasi, ikaw lang naman talaga ang tunay na nakakaintindi sa sarili mo, sa pinagdadaanan mo. Kaya walang ibang makakatulong dyan kung hindi ikaw lang. People will give you advises, but everything is still up to you. You are in-charge and in-control of your life. Help yourself, among others ikaw ang pinakanakakakilala dyan. Don’t let yourself be broken forever. Figure out how to bring yourself back together, you can do it! Make some improvements kahit paonti onti lang and you will not notice nalamapasan mo na pala. Tiwalaan mo ang sarili mo na kaya mo ❤️
Note: Utang na loob huwag kang gumamit ng ibang tao just to fill your emptiness. Mali yan. Bad yan. Nasasaktan pero di mananakit, dapat ganyan ❣️
4. There’s two sides in very situation.
Matagal ko to bago na realize inabot ako ilang months. I was so trap in the world that is full of regrets, what if’s and what could have done. Sinisi ko sarili ko, sinabi ko na deserve mo yan, kasalanan mo yan, di ka kasi nag extra effort,pinabayaan mo, kaya ngayon nandun na siya sa iba. I was so hard on myself.
Then my friend told me perfect ba yang ex mo? Wala bang ginawang mali yan sayo. Then I begin to realize na oo nga noh gago din un.
Isang malaking stress din siya sa buhay ko. Isipin mo ngayon wala mangugulit sayo, wala kang kailangan iupdate kung humihinga ka pa ba? buhay ka pa ba? Ilang tabo ang tubig ang naubos nung naligo ka? Ilang beses mo nginuya ung lunch mo? May tumubo bang bagong buhok sa kilikili mo? Ilang beses ka pumikit ngayon araw? Wala ka na sa isang toxic na relasyon. Walang away. Walang palitan ng masasakit na salita. Wala ng kailangan pagipunan na sapatos kasi malapit na ang birthday niya o kaya mag anniversary, monthsary o weeksary na kayo. Hindi mo kailangan mag compose ng good morning or good night messages na nakapakahaba kasi pag mailkli lang, di mo daw siya mahal. Wala kang kailangan pakalamahin, alagaan o kaya ipamper kasi galit siya sa mundo. Gala all you can to, jamming all you want. Walang restrictions, no compromises and no rules. Kung anung gusto mong gawin magagawa mo na. You just mind your own life. Paalala lang ha, everything should be in moderation parin. Lahat ng sobra nakakasama baka mapahamak ka naman. Huwag masyadong harab na harab sa freedom, friend.
Make this perfect time to be better, to improve yourself. Sabi nga nila “galingan mo maging single”. Make an extra effort sa work mo, sa career mo. Alagaan mo ung pamilya mo. Catch up with your friends. Make new friends. Make a new hobby. Focus on the things that you are really passionate about. Gawin mo ung mga bagay na dapat dati mo pang ginawa. Make use of all the time you have. Ika nga “Maximize your season”.
There are two sides in every situation. Sabi nga ng friend ni george sa the how’s of us “depende nlng talaga kung saan ka tumitingin”.
5. Yourself is your greatest enemy.
Kung gaano mo siya kakapi ganon mo din kalaban. It’s so hard to be drown in your own thoughts. Ung you’ll question your worth. Ang hirap na sarili mo mismo ang baba ng tingin sayo.
When you are in this situation walang ibang makakatulong sayo kundi si papa God. Just pray everywhere, anywhere. Ako nun kahit sa CR nagmamakaawa ako kay papa God. Surrender all to Him. Ipagdasal mo na tangalin niya na lahat ng sakit, maka moveon ka na, mapagod ka na, malampasan mo na to, matangap mo na , matapos na lahat. He is greater than all your fears, worries and sufferings. ❣️
6. Forgive and Forget!
Forgive muna. Forgive him for all the pain he caused you. Sobrang easy ng stage na to sa akin to the point na gusto kong magbalikan pa kami, ayusin ulit namin, balik kami sa umpisa, ganon. Pagmahal mo kasi ung tao ung galit mo humuhupa yan. Ung pagod mo napagpapahinga yan. Pero ung pagmamahal mo hinding hindi basta napapagod at humuhupa.
Pero wait may plot twist pala. After ilang months nalaman ko na may bago na agad siya, katrabaho niya pa ha. Sobrang galit na galit ako, sympre 7 years kami and ang bilis naman. Anu un? Di siya nag move on, nanligaw agad? Biglang type agad? Di niya alam ang 3 months rule? Ilang months kung iniyakan ang katotohanan na un. An daming tumatakbo sa isip ko. “Hayup na to niloloko na ba ako neto matagal na?” “Kaya ba ang lamig lamig ng pota”.
I never clarify, speak or message him about this. What’s the point wala na kami. Although I attempted to, but I still choose to keep it to myself. I grief in silence. Then one day someone told me that your happy with this girl. And I realize that was everything I wished and pray after our break up. Even wala na tayo, I only want the best for you and your happiness. If this girl is your happiness sino ba naman ako para ipagkait un sayo? After everything that has happen to us, you deserve to love and be loved. Actually everyone deserves it, even me, of course. Iba iba naman tayo ng time, di naman paunahan.
It’s easy to forgive when you accept all the things that happened. Madali kitang napatawad pati ang sarili ko ng matangap ko lahat. Knowing that your happy with this new girl made me realize na baka dumadaan tayo sa buhay ng isang tao para ihatid siya sa tamang tao. Baka hinatid lang kita papunta sa kanya. It’s painful pero masaya ka diba, un naman importante. Sasaya din sympre ako! Baka di pa ako totally ready, healed and di ko pa time.
In order for me to fully move on. I need forget everything about you. I’m still on this processing though. Every messages in social media, text messages, even your number, I deleted them all kasi wala ng point, wala na tayo. Also, to prevent me na mag back read and hope na baka meron pa. Pati letters sinunog ko, lahat ng damit na meron ka sa akin tingal ko, lahat ng regalong binigay mo tinapon ko. Everything that will remind me of you, I erased them all. As if you never existed on my life. Pinatay ko lahat – masasaya at pangit na alala na meron tayo.
Alam kong hindi madaling kalimutang ang pitong taon. Pero kailangan kong ulit ibangon ang sarili ko, kailangan ko ulit siya buohin. Ung hindi niya kailangan ng ibang tao para mabuo siya. Ung ako lang sapat na.
7. Things happened are bound to happen
Pag nalampasan mo na ang anger and regrets, napatawad mo na ang sarili mo, napatawad mo siya at natangap mo na lahat. You’ll be able to see clearly. Marerealize na ngyari lang ang dapat magyari, kung bakit hinayaan ng diyos na masaktan ka.
Hindi kayo para sa isa’t isa. No one will ever be good enough for the wrong person. God allow everything to happen because it’s the only way to the right person. Naging instrumento lang kayo ng isat isa para inihanda kayo sa tamang tao. Para pag dumating na siya you know how to value relationship, what really is the true meaning of commitment at you know what is your worth in a relationship.
In love you don’t always lose. You may not have ended up like you planned and imagine it to be. But you gain lessons, it helped you to be a better person, it changes you, it improved you and I think nanalo ka pa rin! ❤️
Happy move on! Kaya mo yan 😎
