They say that falling in love in this generation is scary because loyalty is scarce and rare. i knew this for a fact and yet i still succumbed to the tricks of a trickster. But hey, i was 3 steps ahead of this Class A, A**hole. I for one am not new to all sorts of misfits that happens in relationships. I got the usual “Pa-asa” thing going on with me being led on cause i was too “Pokmaru” and the many almost relationship types but this one right here, is uncharted territory for me that led me to really share it for my fellow Warrior ladies out there to avoid these types of relationships. You only get to be the victim if you allow it to. So, we met a few months back when an old acquaintance introduced us as i was happily doing grocery at our local grocery store. By then we we’re engaged in blissful conversations in the middle of the aisle so we exchanged numbers and when we parted we texted incessantly. We used other platforms for communication and we never seemed to run out of topics. Our calls would seem endless to the point where my ear would start hurting but it didn’t bother me one bit because I was certainly attracted to this fellow. We would always talk about his family and mine, we shared personal information about ourselves that made me real comfortable with him.
As a lady, we know when a guy is keenly interested in us but for the many times I’ve been hurt i couldn’t just assume and agree to go on dates with every guy that comes my way so i was taking my sweet sweet time. It took me a month to finally agree to go on a date with him, an actual date. The date was amazing. We were already on the stage of talking about past relationships, how it ended, how it started, what went wrong and discussed it thoroughly and he actually gave me new insights. Which shocked me because of the level of maturity our conversation has become and again, PLUS POINTS. One date turned to two then 3 and so on and so forth and we’d have short meet ups right here and there. But by this time we both mutually agreed that we indeed liked each other and that yes, we were dating. He said he was single and i said so was i so there was no problem there. We weren’t in a relationship like boyfriend-girlfriend thing, but we were together . With this in mind, i felt like i had that sort of “Right” to ask for his social media profile so i could add it. To which he said, he had none. i was internally confused but i simply asked “what? why?” he explained to me why so i listened but did i really believed him then? 80% yes because his reasons seemed plausible and valid, 20% i was in doubt like my mind did not accept it, my gut? was in hurdles. His reasons seemed valid to me because i could somewhat relate to it so i tried to convince that 20% (and my gut) to believe his qualms. So i gave him the benefit of the doubt, my mind and my heart both agreed. The whole dating stage was blissful to say the least. Coming from a very toxic relationship before him, it was very refreshing. My needs came before his and this right here is every Woman’s weakness, as much as i don’t like to admit it. He was caring, sweet and most of all matured in every way possible, but i couldn’t have been more wrong. By this time, I was contemplating on how to introduce him to the family since i’m a very family oriented person. I was bat-sh*t scared with the thought of it and it sent different waves of fears all over my body, but i was ready to face whatever was coming just for this. He would constantly drop the 4 letter word already and i was dying to reciprocate it verbally but hesitate and tell myself to save it for when everything is official. So i started rehearsing possible questions my family would throw at me, i was basically preparing but then the answers that came in my head were very vague like i didn’t believe it. So if i myself didn’t believe it how would i make my family believe it. So i put my stalking skills to use. i was already in doubt at this point. the 20% that used to be at the back of my mind now became 50% and my gut, my intuition tells me to know more about him because there were pieces that didn’t fit.
I was reaching a dead end. no matter how much I try to look for him i couldn’t. Important details were missing, I wanted to ask him but I couldn’t bring myself to. I was determine to solve this puzzle on my own. But I was desperate so I asked a friend of mine for help, luckily, as our conversation ran its course light bulb in my head struck. I suddenly know where to look. A few minutes in to the search, plugging in the right term on the search bar, and bingo…
What I discovered was something i have never imagined in my entire life…he’s MARRIED. To a beautiful girl I did not know existed. And the thought that I almost became a home-wrecker, with out my knowledge, if i might add, I literally vomited. Like my body was grossed out. I was in literal shock, i did not know what to feel, what to say. I know I was mad, I was hurt and i wanted to kill him. But all I could do was send him a message saying “Paano mo nagawa sa akin ‘to?” and that was the end of it. I blocked him. Everywhere. Because i figured that whatever his explanation will be, it’ll just be a waste of time because i cannot and will never be able to believe him again and HE DOESN’T deserve to be heard. The most painful part of it all, is the feeling of Humiliation, Betrayal. I can deal with the loss, I’ve lost more than I can count, but this? This is all so new to me. Why would someone do this? But then again I was 3 steps ahead of him, So the worse hasn’t happened at all.
After everything, this has taught me a valuable lesson. Ladies, always listen to your gut. It is something God has given us to aid us in unfaithful situations. If your gut tells you there’s something wrong, Investigate. Investigate.Investigate. DO NOT ASSUME but at the same time DO NOT ACCUSE, always obtain the proof. And if you do prove that infidelity is occurring, get out of that relationship. and most importantly ladies, DO NOT BE THE VICTIM.
