Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the official position of Boiling Waters PH.
What is Love? A common question that has always been in the minds of humans. As the writer of this article I believe there is no legitimate and specific definition to this as I have a belief that we, individuals have our own definition of love. It just depends on your experiences and how you perceive it.
The existence of love has always been there ever since the beginning of time. It has always been part of the life and something that all humans have experienced. Love varies from different feelings, states, and attitudes that can range from interpersonal affection and to simple pleasures. Love is unusually difficult to consistently define in contrast with the other emotional states. It can range from interpersonal affection to pleasure. It can be a virtue that represents human kindness and compassion. It can also refer to an emotion of attraction that is strong and personal attachment.
As I said it is something that we all have experienced whether it’s towards your parents, partners, children, country, neighbour, or God. From my personal experience love has always been a part of life. Growing up, I had dreams and daydreams of being in love and has always imagined my ideal and perfect relationship, it was the typical thing to do when you believe that you’re in love when simply it’s just a mere infatuation and of course the inevitable possibility of having a crush.. I loved how my idea of falling in love with a person was something that can be done so easily, I never really of thought of the obstacles and complications and the problems that can happen if you ever fall into this state. When I reached the age in which I entered my teenage year in which being committed to having relationships or let’s just say having a boyfriend or a girlfriend was a priority for some teenagers. I, myself didn’t consider relationships as a priority as I was raised in a strict family that forbids me from it and only wishes that my main focus was my academic performance. But love came all so unexpectedly for me. I met a boy the same age and class as me. Fate or Destiny brought us together, friendship bonded us and so love blossomed between us. As we grew closer and closer, romantic feelings started to develop for each other. It was like how I imagined when I was younger, it went smoothly, He liked me, I liked him. It was as simple as that. I was sure that this wasn’t infatuation but love. But my sweet and innocent little self was too naïve to think that everything was going to go fine if our feelings were just mutual. The boy I foolishly fell for fell in love with someone else. The heartbreaking pain I felt upon hearing and seeing him love somebody else. It was something that I couldn’t take in. Every day the distance between us grew it was so apart that we ended up being just best friends. I endured the pain and pretending that it was fine. His words “I don’t love you anymore’’ were like pins slowly penetrating my heart and that confirms that the love that blossomed between us withered away and I should just accept it and move on and so I did but fate is just ever so cruel it always loved playing games. The boy came back suddenly confessing his love for me once again and my idiotic self automatically accepted and didn’t even get angry at the fact that he acted like nothing ever happened between us and told him that I still held for feelings for him and the fact that I moved on was just a lie. So we got together and once again everything went fine, I was happy and we had a healthy relationship. After a few months, we got separated due to loss of communication and later we reunited but this reunion gave me a huge disappointment as he changed so much, he turned into a person that he said he will never be. Back then he used to reply so fast and eagerly to my messages and now he doesn’t even make the effort to reply. Day by day he rejected my company and I never got to see him again until one day he messaged saying he has a girlfriend and that things are over between us. That was the last message that I ever received from him and the last contact we had each other. I got depressed months after and neglected myself. My health deteriorated and soon I realized that I was destroying myself and it’s all just because of one stupid boy. It took me awhile to be on the road of recovery but I made myself to be strong and promised myself to forget about him and to learn upon my mistakes.
The wonders of having your first love. Whether your experience with your first love maybe bad or good, it is something that can impact on your relationships on the future for the rest of your life. There was a quote that says “First love never dies” and I agree. It was said that people have the tendency to compare their current relationships to their first love. From my personal experience, despite the fact that my first love didn’t ended up well, I am still thankful for my mistakes as I can learn upon from it and prevent from making them again in the future.
My advice to the readers of this article especially if you’re new to Love or currently had a break up or find my experience somehow relatable and similar to yours is that Love can’t be something that you’re expecting. It can be full of obstacles and that we should be prepared to face them all no matter how hard. I learned that we shouldn’t be taken advantaged of and that we shouldn’t allow ourselves to be stupid enough to get hurt especially if the reason why you’re in pain is not even worth for you to feel. No matter how you experienced love surely you’ll look back on it and laugh nostalgically at it, don’t be devastated over the fact that it was over, smile because it happened.