Hello and Goodbye

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It was your last day; I did not think much back then, but that’s when it started.

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Thousands of words burst through my mind, as we pass again on the same aisle, such as, ”How are you?”, ”Where have you been?”, ”It’s been a long time.” In that exact moment, I’ve always been wishing for even a short time for us to chat about quite a few things for you to stay, but then, “Hello” and “Goodbye” were the only words I can say.

Yes, we were friends, but not that close. You have no idea how much I love our group lunch ’cause that’s the only time that I can get to know more about you than “Hello” and “Goodbye.”

Months later, I realized that the happiness that I felt every time our paths cross was snatched away, as I learned that you just had your last day. ”Is this real?” I asked myself, as I wish we had the chance to be close as friends.

Until one night, while I was aimlessly scrolling through my Facebook feed, pop. You sent me a Facebook message.

From Facebook stories, we start exchanging our real stories. Through our late night conversation, I have discovered and love how you serve the Lord. As our conversation grows, I get to appreciate you as a person.

Then one night, it felt like my heart was jumping for joy, and won’t stop from beating as you confessed that you like me from the very start. I didn’t tell you then that I liked you too since I was praying about it. We started getting closer and prayed for each other. I’ve imagined the things I’ll tell the people I love, as it really was worth the wait, and that finally, I’ve found the guy that may be the one I’ve been praying for the longest time.

While staying in the tale and believing that everything is on its place, a twist of fate happened and you started apologizing, telling me that you realized that you weren’t ready for a relationship yet, and so decided to stop from courting me. These words struck me, like a blade prickling through my heart. I wanted to ask why. But the only words I said are “okay” and  “goodbye.” The hope and courage that I had, suddenly crushed.  “What happened?” ; ”Did I do something wrong?”; ”Wasn’t I enough?”

I walked into my room and prayed. Then God made me realized that, despite this, He answers our prayers.

Not everything that we feel right is His will. In the end, it’s not what we feel that confirms His will, but it’s His way that we need to trust.