Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the official position of Boiling Waters PH.
“It doesn’t make any sense. But one day I know it all will.”
It’s certain that at some point or maybe right now, you’re going through the darkest phase of your life that nobody knows about. You’d smile, laugh and act in front other people like there’s nothing wrong, like everything’s okay but deep inside you know there’s nothing you can do but just stand in front of your whole world and watch it fall apart. It’s exhausting. It’s like trying to put every piece of your broken heart and shattered world back to how it used to be despite of the fact that you can’t save it anymore.
Maybe it doesn’t need the ‘saving.’
Maybe what it needs is the ‘understanding’ that you don’t have to make sense of everything that is happening around you.
You’ll ask God why do you have to go through pain, suffering and loss. You’ll ask Him because you know you don’t deserve it. You’ll come to a point where you’re desperately looking for answers among the stars, galaxies and other foreign bodies that seemingly serves as a hope for you to know the reason behind the horrible situation you’re in right now. You’re at the end of your bargain. But still, you don’t get the answer that you’ve always been looking for. It’s like praying for Him to guide you, strengthen you and walk with you as you go through the lowest point of your life. Unfortunately, hope seems to be found nowhere. You’re already on the verge of giving up. Everything seems to be at its worse and you can’t do anything about it.
Maybe you really don’t need to do something about it.
Maybe the situation itself puts you in a position where you have to learn to let things be. To let things happen the way they are supposed to.
Because that’s where you’ll learn. That’s where you’ll grow. That’s how God wants you to know that His great plans for you doesn’t always come with convenience. He wants you to know that life isn’t a bed of roses. It is a garden full of thorns you need to watch out for. But sometimes you’ll trip, you’ll pick yourself out with thorns, and you’ll bleed. And I think that’s okay. Without pain, you’ll never know how to heal. Without the scars, you’ll never be strong. Without Him, you know that you can never go on.
You’re wondering how long all of your unanswered prayers, agony that were never heard and unseen sorrow will last because you know to yourself that your heart and your soul can no longer take the pounding. You’re wondering how long the wounds will heal and when will you be happy again. You seemed to be fighting a battle you’re always losing. But He wants you to just simply trust the process. He wants you to be patient with yourself. He wants you to know that you can allow yourself to give up the battle and let Him finish it for you.
Maybe this is why you can’t feel the progress you’re making. Maybe this is why everything turns out worse because you’ve been holding on to something you’re already supposed to let go. You have to let go now. Because as much as He wants to save you, He wants you to save yourself too.
So maybe this is why God won’t calm the storm. Because He doesn’t want you to withstand it. He just simply wants you to let it run its course before you see the sun shine, again.
Maybe this is why God won’t calm the storm. Because He wants to calm you amidst of the storm. For you to know, that the pain will sting but the wounds will heal.
Remember, there’s always beauty behind the ruins.