Waiting is never pointless when you’re waiting on the Lord.
When you wait on the Lord, it means you surrender everything to Him, and lift up to Him ‘every dream and desire’ you have as He prepares you for the next chapters of your life, which include leading you to The Right One: your spouse.
Remember, “Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.” (Prov. 19:21 NIV)
This doesn’t mean you don’t do anything else. You do your part in the process. While waiting, prepare your heart, prepare yourself. Your goal is a Godly Marriage that lasts a lifetime (and even transcends into eternity), not short & pointless love affairs. Your goal must also be to become “the right one” for the person God is preparing for you. And while you’re doing that, pray; Pray and wait patiently.
Pray for God’s guidance, pray for God’s protection, pray for God’s wisdom, pray for God’s grace over your life, pray for Spirit-led decision-making, pray for God’s intervention in every choice you make, pray for God’s presence in everything…
I don’t think there is such a thing as praying too much. God would want that you involve Him as it should be Him who is the center of our lives. We have to learn to guard our hearts that even when we become the “other half” of “the right one”, God is still the center and most important part of our life.
“Every dream and desire”
David wrote a Psalm which includes the verse, “Take delight in the Lord, and He will give you your heart’s desires.” (Psalm 37:4 NLT)
This verse does not teach us to please God so that He will give us everything we dream of and desire. God doesn’t work like a genie*.
This psalm teaches us to take delight in our Lord and Savior, which means to desire His presence, to desire His love, to desire Him in everything, to desire God to be our all in all, and become consumed with God.
When we are so consumed with His presence, His love, His guidance, His grace, His goodness, everything else is diminished. We become enlightened that everything we set ourselves to desire is temporal, then we learn to desire what God desires for us.
“Wait Patiently”
Waiting on the Lord is absolutely right, and it is good. However, the part where it says “patiently” may not be entirely pleasant. It is going to be a challenge, and a great deal of other tests and trials will surely arise while we are in this season and process.
While we wait for our “Mr. or Mrs. Right”, the enemy will definitely focus on our distraction, and lead us to our destruction.
We will face all kinds of ‘temptation’, and it is inevitable. As we draw closer to God in our waiting, the evil one will also device plans to pull us away from God and His plans and promises. These temptations will pose as objects, people, events, and even opportunities. These will draw our interest and grab our attention. If we are not careful, we will definitely be swayed.
One thing I learned from my own season of waiting is, “it is good to exercise caution”. Being cautious will keep you alert of the red flags and the “don’ts” of a relationship. However, when our caution is not paired with devotion, we are bound to fail.
We can always keep a list of all the good qualities we want our ‘spouse-to-be’ must have, but we can never truly see the heart and the character without the help of the Holy Spirit.
Without devotion, and without God and the Holy Spirit, the enemy can easily deceive us. It is important, though, that as we immerse in God’s word, love and presence, that we are intentional in all our desires and prayers.
“Immersed and Consumed”
To be immersed means to be “dipped” or “submerged” in liquid. When you are immersed in water, you are fully surrounded. Water fully wraps you from head to toe; the water consumes you entirely.
This is the same act that happens during water baptism.
Water baptism symbolizes our full commitment, total trust, and total reliance in God through His Son, Jesus Christ. For many of us, getting baptized in water after receiving Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior is an act of public declaration of our faith and belief in our Lord Jesus Christ. Whether we like it or not, it is a declaration of war. After all, we are in constant battle against the one who steals, kills and destroys (John 10:10); in the world we live in, the war we are facing is that of principalities and spiritual forces of evil (Ephesians 6:12).
In modern society, to be immersed in something means to focus on, be absorbed with, and be deeply involved in what we are currently doing. In most cases, this is a way to achieve our goals and ambitions. In other words, you allow the tasks and the checklists of your goals and ambitions to consume you; consume your mind, consume your heart, consume your time, consume your attention, consume you resources, consume your health and well-being, and even consume your faith (sadly, this is true for so many).
We need to take note, this does not mean that all you should focus on and involve yourself in is finding a spouse just because your goal is a Godly marriage. NO! Your main focus is God. It is all about God. The moment you think everything revolves around you or your dream to find a spouse, stop. Remember The One that authored love is The One writing your love story.
Remember, “Seek first the Kingdom of God and all these shall be added unto you.” (Matthew 6:33).
We must establish that the most important relationship we have is our relationship with our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ. This is the most secure relationship we can have. This is the best relationship we can be in.
Let God satisfy your heart first so you will no longer look for love in the wrong places (with the wrong person).
“Being Intentional”
The intention is to find a Godly spouse, and have a Godly marriage, isn’t it? But this is just the tip of the iceberg.
When we say “Be Intentional”, we need to lay down the standards. Not our standards, but God’s standards.
Of course, we want to have a good looking spouse, a smart one, a talented one, a funny one, one who can sing or dance or play any instrument etc, etc, etc. There is nothing wrong with asking God to give you a spouse with any of these qualities. However, if we want a Godly marriage, we need to establish the “Non Negotiables”. These are the qualities and characteristics of a person who loves Jesus, a worshiper, someone who will lead you and your future family to God, and someone who will work with you in the Kingdom of God.
We have to remember that Marriage is not for us. You read that right, it’s not for me, it’s not for you. Marriage is for God. He designed it, He made it, He made it for His glory, and for a great purpose.
And what is that purpose?
Spread the good news. Share Jesus. Share His love. Share His grace. Be God’s ambassador.
I am Xishi. I waited for almost an entire decade, almost gave up, but surrendered my life and relationship status to The Lord, and now happily married to my wonderful husband, Chris.
From just CHRIST and Xishi,
HE allowed Chris and Xishi.
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*Genies are not biblical. You may have heard of it, read of it, but it’s not from God, and it’s not a belief of any follower and believer of Jesus Christ.
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If you’ve read this far, Thank you.
May GOD Bless you with more wisdom.
If you’re already married, please feel free to comment any additional wisdom.
If you’re single, I hope this helps, God is with you all throughout your waiting season and beyond.
