I don’t know what kind of pain is this, I just know that it caused me to ache for nothing at all. This feeling I will never know how long will last… Maybe for the rest of my life.
You are not the man whom I leave for my dreams and still thinking for what ifs. But when I think of you, all that I could think of is what if you choose to be the man of my man longed for?
You are not the guy whom I thought would be so faithful to me but choose to cheat. But when I think of you, I just wish you fulfilled your little promises decades ago before I even existed to your chaos.
You are not the boy whom I choose to take the risk and fight for, but even at the start he didn’t needed it. But when I think of you, I just hope you needed someone to fight for you and fought back for them too.
And then after all these heart breaks and bleeding that almost ripped my heart out I realized that there you are, the most painful battle of my life.
I realized that before I even existed to this world there is these pain, and heart breaks, and tears, and wounds, and bruises, waiting for me to feel.
I know, that before the stars fall, before the sun sets, before the full moon there you are, the only man that teaches me there’s nothing last forever.