Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the official position of Boiling Waters PH.
It’s a simple fact of life but we often like to complicate it; those who love you will show it and those who miss you will say it. It’s not always black and white, I understand, but if you have to constantly blame someone for their lack of actions or question someone’s intentions or wonder if that person misses you or loves you, then the answer is clearer than you think. Those who love you will not keep you wondering if they care or if you mean something to them and those who miss you will not go weeks or months without talking to you or reaching out to you.
We make it complicated by giving them excuses or blaming their ego or their pride, but I have seen people who brushed everything aside because the person meant more to them than their ego and was more important to them than their pride. I’ve seen people apologize for their mistakes and try to make up for them. I’ve seen people constantly show up and reach out against all odds and I’ve seen people go the extra mile just to be there for someone, so don’t let anyone fool you into believing that they don’t have time or they’re busy or they’re too afraid to reach out.
Do not reproach people for their actions, because they know what they should do or what they should have done. They know how to send that text or make that call. They know how to be consistent, honest and communicative. They know how to ask about you during difficult times or express their love to you when you’re doubting it. They know how to reassure you and make you feel safe with them. They know, but they’re choosing not to show that side of themselves to you. They know, but they’re doing it on purpose, and that’s why you should do the same.
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It’s time to stop extending yourself to those who don’t even try. It’s time to take people off the pedestal when they can go months or years without talking to you. It’s time to stop being emotionally attached to those who are emotionally unavailable to you. It’s time to stop loving them when they don’t reciprocate that love. It’s time to stop taking it personally, because you are not supposed to measure your self-worth based on someone’s inability to love you right or show up for you. You are not supposed to settle for breadcrumbs either, because these people can give so much more and it’s not your job to make them realize that.
It’s a simple fact of life; those who love you will show you that they don’t want to lose you and those who miss you will do anything to make sure you don’t part ways again.